Ladies and gentlemen… Harold the historian!!! Oh, hello there. I am Harold, the historian... famous writer and author of books, such as... "The Book of Bookin he art of booking things". Anyway... I have heard that most of you, mostly the lads that is... have problems with finding, you know... ladies... So I, the famous Casanova, Harold the historian... am now going to give you some advise, my best tips, for dating. And remember, I'm here for you. BUY MY BOOK! So, let's start, shall we? As the gentleman persona I am, I'm going to teach you how to deal with the opposite sex. *mumbles* Provided that you follow these four simple rules that I've set up for you... nothing could really go wrong. So, what do you say, shall we start? So, here we are. Ah, spring; the season of amour... Love is in the air, isn't it? Oh, wait! It's autumn! Oh, silly me, silly me. Don't bother! Just continue with the... Yes, yes. Continue... Anyway, in this re-enactment of what is going to be a most tender moment... we can now see that we have two main ingredients for a joyous late night romance; A location... and an object, well that being "the girl" of course. And what about the third piece then? The third piece is where you come in. Well, basically you are the third piece. So now, let's move on to the first tip, shall we? Well, perhaps you've heard people saying "Just be yourself and it will be allright". Well, those people are wrong... such as we will see in the case of Billy here... yes... I am so happy So happy am I! Oooooh! She is beautiful! Hello. *sighs* How do you do? Date me if you want to live... Oh, Arnold! You see, it works to be a cool Austrian movie star. *Laughs* Well, as you just recently saw... sunglasses and thrilling catchphrases can do wonders for the wannabe romantic. But if you can't afford sunglasses or catchphrases... you might as well do with this... money! Do you see what I'm talking about? Oh, hello... You know... I'm rich! If you don't have the either the sunglasses or the catchphrases or perhaps the money enough... You could always try... being smoking hot... like me... heh... Well... If you're not hot. You could always try to be famous, it always works... like me... Hello! I said hello... Oh Johnny! But... If I don't have any of these qualities... Won't I get any girls? No, you won't... ?