hi this is patty Contenta with ask an expert answering your love and sensuality questions I hear about women who have the its factor what exactly is that and how can I get it during my research I found that there were three comin traits that mankind I've always bring up when it comes to what they find attractive in a woman and the three things that they often said was a woman who is playful which means she spotted venture is a nice to do cool things second one was a woman who's carrying which means she enjoys communicating she's in touch with their feelings she's very carrying sincere and finally the third one was sexy they always talk about that they want a woman who is comfortable in her skin who enjoys being a woman who sensual and really it's important that is a combination of all those three things that are really the good recipe for getting this it factor and let me explain why because if you just have one if you're just a place for women sometimes they could see was just one of the guys you kinda cool and if you just try this caring woman well then you might compare it to his mom and if you just the sexy woman then bill just want to use you for one thing and have fun with you and that's it so really the recipe is how you use all three in your life and so my goal for you would be that you actually learn how do we add these attributes into my life because you can learn and become aware them so the first thing if you look at playful is maybe you want to start doing some things are a little out of your comfort zone you know I started to create a bucket list answer to do things like ziplining rock climbing going to restaurants by myself at the bar something I never did in the past and I'm so comfortable with two so that I learned to have conversations with people around me whatever that comfort zone is for you step out is it a little bit and have fun with it the second thing is caring and usually this is something that's very simple ways women were natural communicators we love to engage with people in happened conversation and collaborate with them so the only thing I would say is when you doing that just pay attention to again you sort of passive voice so that you're more from a place at support is listening perhaps a not always telling people what to do but really caring about what they're going through so the more the lean back conversation and the last thing would be sexy well that's really about your body language in being comfortable with your skin and being feminine so gonna take that last 10 that kinda play with it on how you stack because we can turn up the volume on the way we stats that we come a little bit of a brighter be can so that a lotta guys to notice you so gonna start with back right here so one of the things that we can do we stand as be aware that as a woman we really want is that was our legs apart because the mall when I do this I really do not feel masculine so the first thing I want to do is stand in third position ballet the front leg is on the instep with the back way that's number one then I always want to create a curve cuz it's always about angles and curves and that's what makes a woman sensuous and create that is factor right so if you bend your friend me and really settle nice thing to that back it you instantly lean back and you've created your first curve right and if you push you need in a little bit more you create another little curve which is even nicer see got to Chris going on sold a pleaser always down so that your chest is up you never allow your shoulder blades to let go and have forward shoulders you know you really want to make sure that their Engage so that you have a proper posture good and then that's the first step then let's say you want to hit up some more your elbows and said it kinda not knowing what to do with them if you put your hands on your thighs and press your elbows back a little bit you can have it almost instantly a smaller waist this is they're kinda hanging there they don't know what to do press them against your body pressure I was back a little bit and just ease up into that position then if you want to turn it up some more you can use your hand touch yourself gently when you having a conversation caress whatever party your body stay on the outside shoulder you clavicle bone is a really hot so you can touch that a little bit when you standing there and if you get it artist thing that position maybe once put your foot out and the little bit further into your hip a little more and maybe play with your purse when you there perhaps gentle the massage your back a little bit cuz you getting a little tired to stand here and then bring your elbows back out you know use accidental drop serve the dress the kind of fix it look at it all this to call attention to yourself when you're standing have fun with it do it slowly and feel a little bit more of a sensual stance that is your own little private bubble of pleasure the dope